You may be asking yourself what bras, lemons and elections have in common? Yesterday one of my good friends, and before I continue, let me tell you how good of a friend she is. She is the type of friend that shows up at bell choir with a bag of lemons and bras for me. I am pretty sure my own mother never bought me a bra and this is by no means a reflection of how good of a mother she was, but she never bought me a bra, my step-mother did.
Now you are probably wondering why my friend is buying me bras? Well, this goes back a few months ago. One Saturday, I was at her house trying on clothes, church clothes, and I ran into a dilemma, I had on a sports bra and the shirt I was trying on was not meant to be worn with a sports bra. My friend then remembered she had a bra she had bought for her mother in her closet and that it might fit me and it did, which is now how she makes the mom/bra/me connection.
Last weekend there was a two for one sale on bras at a local department store and she was buying some bras for her mother and then made the mom/bra/me connection and now I have two lovely new bras, as well as a bag of lemons. How lucky I am to have a friend who cares enough to buy me bras. As for the lemons, there is no connection with the bras. She just happens to have a fruitful lemon tree.
As for the connection between bras, lemons and elections, here is where it all began. As my friend handed me the bag of lemons and bras, she was flipping through a magazine and there was a picture of Mike Huckabee and she said, "Who are you voting for and if you are voting for him, then we can't be friends anymore." Luckily for me, his name alone makes him a "nay" on my ballot and if I could get past the name "former Baptist-pastor" would be the "nay factor."
As I gave her my answer, she was relieved. Then she asked who I was voting for in the primary election, "Hillary or Barack or anyone else?" Then I told her I am registered as a Republican and she gasped, but before she could speak I told her that, "I am not committed to the Republican party and have in the past been a registered Democrat." I told her, "I can not be defined by a party. But as for who I am voting for, about the only thing I have decided is who I am not voting for and I know Huckabee and Romney are on that list." Then I tell my friend, "In the end, no matter what I say, unless you join me in the voting booth, you will never really know who I am voting for."
As I left bell choir with my lemons and bras and thoughts, I wondered, would the friendship really end over Huckabee? Not that there was the slightest chance I would vote for him. A friend that would go so far to buy me bras and bring me lemons, would end a friendship over politics? Hmmm.... bras, lemons and elections. Do those three things have anything in common? Was she trying to sway my vote with bras and lemons? No, that couldn't be. Where's the connection?
After some thought, here's what I came up with- bras and elections. Bras support boobs, boobs need support. Most political candidates are boobs and need support. Which comes back to needing "Bras." So, how do lemons fit into the equation and elections. Lemon, one that is unsatisfactory. There are many unsatisfactory candidates. Hence they are "lemons." Now, bras and lemons. The only connection I can make is too graphic for my blog, but those who are quick and witty will pick up on the connection between bras, lemons and elections. Here's a clue: squeeze.
As for my friendship, I am safe for now, as long as I don't start scrap booking!
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