It Would Be My Pleasure

My seven year old was beaming when I picked her up from school today. She was holding what looked like a white board and a book in plastic wrap. I was confused because she spent all of her money at the book fair the other day, so where did this book package come from? As she got in the car she explained that the book was her prize from the treasure box. She had a perfect day at school. She made it to "red" on her classroom behavior chart, which means "Really Remarkable Day."

I told her how pleased I was, because great classroom behavior is of the utmost importance in our family. I always feel like if I see the worst of my seven year old at home, that's better than her being that way at school. Of course it would be nice if her "Really Remarkable School Day" could continue into our home life, but again I would much rather have her be on the "red" away from home.

In order to have some insight into what behavior earns "a red mark," I decided to ask what she did. "Well," she explained, "I was helpful to other children on the playground and I said, it would be my pleasure to my teacher when she asked me to do something to help her."

Then I found myself repeating those words out loud, "It would be my pleasure." Funny how I never seem to hear those words when I ask my children to do something for me. Then I ask her "Why don't I ever hear you say it would be my pleasure to me?"

She answers as a matter of fact, "Because you don't have a behavior chart."

And my response, "So, you are saying if we had a behavior chart at home, you would be more inclined to say, it would be my pleasure, if I asked you to clean up your room?"

"Maybe. Maybe if you had a treasure box."

I knew it! There has to be some kind of reward! Some kind of pay off in the end. Funny how I don't seem to remember too many bonus and incentive programs from my childhood. I know my mother had an allowance chart for awhile, but that fizzled out over time and chores became "you have to do them because you are a part of this family and live in this house." Why can't my daughter just say to me "It would be my pleasure" because she wants to help me, her own mom! That would be my pleasure, just to hear her say those words once!